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主题:235-Daryl Davis:黑人怎样与三K党谈笑风生? -- 万年看客

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家园 老外其实不太关心这些事。

打个比方,国外发生了惨事,老外会说:好惨!

然后继续吃饭。

对于中国,老外也没啥感觉。

社会主义思想,其实这个老外也不太厌恶。

不过有一点很难办,老外对专制体制的厌恶,是深入骨髓的。

中国这一点上,是伊朗的同等水平。

家园 主流控制媒体阿
家园 回禀桥老师

极端分子比如三K党,是偏执狂,没法讲道理也没法讲利益。黑人可以当总统,三军参谋长、国防部长,地方首脑,公司头领。哪怕只要三K党徒改邪归正就可以给转变的党徒名声利益,党徒就是一根筋走到黑。

另外,万年河友引文的作者看来是个专职或兼职酒吧驻唱,有多少能量可想而知。

主流代表利益集团,可以讲利益的。西方世界找到利益共同点,变脸速度那叫快。有钱能使鬼推磨,举世皆然。

另外中国外交部或者驻外人员资源比酒吧驻唱多。

事在人为。坐等或者龟缩永远不带来胜利。

通宝推:桥上,
家园 现在的主流也是一根筋

我倒希望他们能讲利益,其实中国这些年来也一直希望讲利益,但实践下来,讲了半天越讲关系越紧张了。所以还是那句话,美国人只懂一种语言

否则他们为什么非得对气球发导弹呢?下回中国打下他们一个什么东西,他们就老实了。

要不然,就是台湾,我一直认为,打下台湾,没了这个摩擦点,中美就可以和平相处了。

家园 禀桥老师

利益是个复杂东西。和人沟通利益需要创造性思维、设身处地的能力和执行能力。

美国和中国当然有利益冲突。美国要维护世界第一的位置,中国在迅速成长。

但是国家利益和总统、部长、议员、地方官员、企业管理人的利益是错综复杂的。而美国没有全世界(或者全美国)资产阶级团结起来这个概念。具体问题具体分析,可以有突破口的。

一个黑人酒吧驻唱能和三K党徒找到共同语言,中国外交官(怎么说是精英吧)和至少比三K党稍微正常点的美国主流当然能。

要能沟通,能设身处地,先要了解别人,就要进入别人世界,就像那个黑人做的,就像秦刚秦部长做的。

比如工作中有个竞争对手,还有小人一天到晚挑拨你们关系(圈、独)。问题在于咱目前还没有实力赶跑他。咱是天天和他骂架呢,还是不卑不亢该合作合作该暗地里使绊子使绊子脸上永远好看,不仅给对手看还给旁观者看,呢?天天骂架容易,爽,但对咱事实上好处有限啊。

通宝推:桥上,
家园 nigger

nigger

通宝推:桥上,
家园 无论哪个国家,民族主义都是害人精

都是掩盖阶级矛盾的遮羞布。那些挑拨汉回矛盾,汉维矛盾,汉满矛盾,汉蒙矛盾的,都是坏人。

家园 我没主张骂架,我是主张打的

我认为美国主流只有打了之后才会变成竞争对手,他们可不是受了什么挑拨。

美国主流可不比3K正常,我不是说您周围的人,气球事件就表明他们一点都不正常,他们也到处杀人。

家园 桥老师如果认为

美国主流和三K党一样极端,那么我就恭敬地结束这场对话了。

家园 这哥们比奥黑更适合当第一个美国黑人总统
家园 我想我理解的主流和您理解的主流不是一回事

我理解的主流是那些攻击中国人种族灭绝、连个气球都要打下来的人。是拿洗衣粉冒充大规模杀伤性武器、于是杀死成千上万人的那些人。和您周围的那些人是两回事。但是说不好,在主流媒体宣传下,这些人有朝一日也许会被裹挟赞成对中国动武。

家园 利用 OpenAI Whisper 小试身手,做个字幕。

上限14000字,就发这么多出来吧。

#-------------------------------#

00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:20,120

#-------------------------------#

Well, we'll start just by giving you all just a little bit of background on

myself to understand where I'm coming from, what I've done in my past, and how I

arrived at this current perspective and why.

So start with, I'm 60 years of age, I was a child of parents in the U.S.

Foreign Service.

So I grew up as an American Embassy brat, traveling and living all around the

world as a child.

You get assigned to a country for two years, you return back home here to the

states, you're here for a few months, maybe a year, and then you get reassigned

to another country.

After all of that, I went to college, high school, here in Rockville, I went to

Wooten High School in Rockville.

I'm from Chicago originally, but since the State Department is here in D.C., we

settled here for a while.

And Howard University in Washington, D.C., where I got my degree in music and

jazz performance.

So I've been a musician ever since I graduated college in 1980.

So when you combine my travels as a child with my folks, I add it to my travels

now as an adult touring musician and things like that.

I have been in a total of 56 different countries on six continents.

So I've literally been exposed to a multitude of cultures, religions,

ethnicities, traditions, et cetera.

And all of that has helped shape my perspectives and who I am today.

So we're going to take a little trip backwards.

I'm going to give you a lot of background on myself, so you understand how I

arrived here, and then later on we'll start into the workshop and the training.

But when I was a kid living overseas in the 1960s in elementary school, things

like that, my classes were filled with other kids from all over the world,

Nigeria, Italy, Japan, France, Russia, Germany, Australia.

Anybody who had an embassy in those countries, all of their children went to the

same school.

#-------------------------------#

00:02:12,240 --> 00:02:17,760

#-------------------------------#

So if you were to open the door to my classroom and peep your head in, you would

say, this looks like a United Nations of Little Kids, because that's exactly

what it was.

And the term you would use today to describe that did not exist back then.

That term is multicultural.

It's still a relatively new term.

I remember when it came out multi-cultural, and I saw one word, but that's what

it was.

And when I would come home back here to the States after my dad's assignment and

go to school here, I would either be in an all-black school or a black and white

school, depending upon whether it was the still somewhat segregated or the newly

integrated.

And there was not the amount of diversity that we have in the classroom today.

Today you walk into pretty much any Montgomery County high school, elementary

school, middle school, what have you, and you see what I was seeing when I was a

child.

But that scenario, when I was living it, had about 12 years before it would come

to the U.S.

So literally I was living 12 years into the future when I was overseas.

When it came, I was already prepared, because that's how I had been living.

Nothing new to me.

But unfortunately, a good number of people were not prepared for that change in

the landscape.

And that's where the breakdown in communication started.

So one of the times, while we were back here, I was in 10th grade at Wooten High

School here in Rockville.

And we had a class called the POTC, which stood for problems of the 20th

century.

Before I get to that, let me tell you about the experience I had when I was 10

years of age.

We had just come back and we were in Belmont, Massachusetts, a suburb of Boston,

only been there a couple of months.

I was one of two black children in the entire school.

#-------------------------------#

00:04:19,880 --> 00:04:27,200

#-------------------------------#

I was in fourth grade, 1968, at the age of 10.

See if you can find me.

That was my life at the age of 10.

I was 10 years old right there.

That's my fourth grade class.

And pretty much everybody in that class liked me, except for this little girl on

the front row in the blue dress.

She always used to call me nigger.

Now, she wasn't making that up.

She was probably getting that from her folks at the age of 10.

This little girl right here in the white dress on the end, almost on the end,

that was my little girlfriend.

You never know what happens to people, but when I left to go back overseas, we

had science class together and each one of us got a crawfish or crayfish live.

We raised it in the little aquarium or whatever.

When I left to go back overseas, I gave her my crayfish.

I've never seen her since, but I found out from someone who did know her, who

grew up in that area and was now working in the D.C.

area, she died of a drug overdose.

So you just never know how people's lives change.

What can we do to communicate, perhaps intervene and change that course of

direction? Okay, so that's my situation there.

Now, the guys you see along the back row with me, those are my friends.

They're all 10 years old too.

Most of them were Cub Scouts and they invited me to join the Cub Scouts, 1968.

Sounded like fun, get to tie some knots, go camping.

So I joined the Cub Scouts.

We had a parade with the Girl Scouts, Boy Scouts, Brownies, 4-H Club and some

other organizations from Lexington to Concord, Massachusetts to celebrate the

ride of Paul Revere.

Lexington was not very far from Belmont, right next door pretty much.

And so my den mother let me carry the American flag and I'm marching with my

fellow Scouts.

I was the only black person in this parade.

#-------------------------------#

00:06:36,040 --> 00:06:41,520

#-------------------------------#

The streets were blocked off.

The sidewalks were lined with white people.

Most of them cheering us, waving flags and yelling the British are coming, the

British are coming.

And everything was good.

Until I got to one point in the parade, all of a sudden I was getting hit with

bottles and soda pop cans and rocks and debris from the street by a small group

of white spectators mixed in with a larger crowd over to my right on the

sidewalk.

From what I remember, it may have been around five people, four or five people.

I remember there being some kids, maybe my age, a little bit older and some

adults who were throwing things.

So I'm assuming it was kids and their parents.

Me being naive and having never experienced anything like this, my first thought

was, oh, those people over there don't like the Scouts.

I didn't realize that I was the only scout that was getting hit until my den

mother, my cub master, my troop leader all came running back and shielded me

with their bodies and escorted me out of the danger.

I kept asking them, why? Why are they hitting me? And all they would say is,

shh, move along, Daryl, move along, move along, it'll be okay.

They never answered my question.

So we all have been 10 years old before.

At 10, if you have questions, you have to have answers.

And if they're not forthcoming, you begin to make up your own to placate your

curiosity.

So I'm thinking, okay, well, maybe they're testing me because I'm new.

I'm the new kid on the block, whatever.

I had every answer but the right answer.

So when I got home, my mother and father were putting that red sticky stuff on

me, macular chrome and band-aids and all that stuff and asking me, how did you

fall down and get all scraped up? And I told them, I didn't fall down.

I told them exactly what had happened.

#-------------------------------#

00:08:23,760 --> 00:08:31,160

#-------------------------------#

And for the first time in my life, my parents sat me down and explained to me

what racism was.

Believe it or not, at the age of 10, I had never heard the word racism.

I knew nothing about it.

I've been with people all over the world, never had any issues.

We may not have spoken the same language in some cases, but we worked together,

we played together, we had slumber parties together, birthday parties together,

all of that.

Never had any problems like this.

And I didn't have brothers and sisters to learn things from from what they had

gone through.

All I had were my parents.

I'm an only child, so my folks got it right the first time.

But I always believed them and trusted them and they never lied to me.

If I had a problem or a question, they provided me with the answers or solutions

or the tools by which I could derive those things.

But when they told me why I was being targeted like this, I did not believe

them.

I literally thought for the first time in my life that my parents were lying to

me because my 10 year old mind could not get around the idea that someone who

had never laid eyes on me, someone who had never spoken to me, someone who knew

absolutely nothing about me would want to inflict pain upon me for no other

reason than this, the color of my skin.

It made no sense.

So I did not believe them.

Well, almost a month and a half later, that same year, 1968, on April the 4th,

Martin Luther King was assassinated.

And I remember it very well.

Nearby Boston, right here, Washington, D.C., my hometown, Chicago, New York,

Philadelphia, Baltimore, Detroit, Los Angeles, Nashville, every major city in

this country burned to the ground with violence and rioting all over this thing

called race.

And so while I did not understand why people had an issue with race, I then

understood that my parents had not lied that there were people who did on both

sides.

#-------------------------------#

00:10:32,320 --> 00:10:37,800

#-------------------------------#

So I had formed a question in my mind at that age.

And that question was, how can you hate me when you don't even know me? And for

the next 50 years, I've been looking for the answer to that question.

Okay, so now, skip ahead, 10th grade, right here, 1974, Rockville, Maryland,

Wooten High School.

We had a class called the POTC, problems of the 20th century.

And it was a class for seniors, but somehow I managed to get in as a sophomore.

And it was a very enjoyable class.

Each always brought on some interesting speakers.

On this day in 1974, he had the head of the American Nazi Party at our school.

Now, you can never do that today, but we're talking in 1974, okay, which a lot

of things were different.

So this guy's name was Matt Cole, K-O-E-H-L.

The American Nazi Party was formed right here in Arlington, Virginia, right off

of Wilson Boulevard by a fellow named George Lincoln Rockwell.

And he was a great proponent of the ideology of Adolf Hitler.

And he formed the American Nazi Party, had all this Nazis, had all, had chapters

all around the country.

And he was always getting into it with Martin Luther King.

Well, George Lincoln Rockwell was murdered by one of his own American Nazis as

he came out of a dry cleaners or laundry mat down in the Clarendon area of

Wilson Boulevard where he and this guy, John Paulter, one of his members, got

into it.

And John Paulter killed him right there on the sidewalk.

So Matt Cole, who was the second in command, then became the commander to George

Lincoln Rockwell's place.

So on this day in 1974, Matt Cole and his right-hand lieutenant came to Wooten

High School.

And they stood in the front of the class espousing the views of white supremacy.

#-------------------------------#

00:12:29,840 --> 00:12:38,160

#-------------------------------#

Now, I was 15 years of age, and I had, it was only one of the black guys in the

class.

I mean, there were more black people in the school, but just in that particular

class.

Matt Cole pointed at him and pointed at me and said, we're going to ship you

back to Africa.

Then he went like this.

And all you Jews out there, you're going back to Israel.

Now, I had never heard talk like that before.

And I was just, he didn't frighten me, but I was just kind of like, you know,

shocked.

You know, where's this man coming from? What's up with him? And I didn't say a

word to him because, you know, that generation, of which I was a part at age 15,

we were raised to have, to respect your elders as figures of authority, whether

they were your teachers, you know, a police officer, the mailman, your natural

neighbor, anybody who was older than you was your elder, and therefore that

person was to be respected as a figure of authority.

Whether you agree with them or not, you simply show them respect.

So I just sat there looking at him, not believing him and not agreeing with him,

but I didn't want to, you know, attack him, so to speak.

So somebody in my class said, well, what happens if they don't go? And Matt Cole

said, oh, they have no choice.

If they do not leave voluntarily, they will be exterminated in the upcoming race

war.

That was the first time I ever heard the term race war.

You know, what is this man talking about? The Civil War? No.

You know, that was over in 1865.

So later that day, I'm standing beside my locker, and Matt Cole and Martin Kerr

are leaving.

They've been there all day with different POTC classes, and they had to walk

past me.

Nobody in the hall, but two of them and myself at the locker.

Well, I turned and I looked at them coming down the hall, and they got right

here and sneered at me, didn't say a word, just sneered at me and then started

laughing and walked past me and down to the front of the school and out the

door.

#-------------------------------#

00:14:25,360 --> 00:14:29,720

#-------------------------------#

That was the starting point for me to take this, how can you hate me when you

don't even know me thing seriously, and start doing my research and try to find

out answers to this.

There were no classes you could take on racism, you know, and I bought every

book I could find starting back then.

家园 沟通的·精髓

所以倾听别人说话很重要,如果你能够主动倾听其他人说话,那么你同时也会被动地向对方输出关于你自己的信息。当你积极学习别人的时候,也在消极地向别人传授你自己。所以永远要透明,永远要诚实,要将你的人品与尊严摆在当面。因为你在人际交流当中所拥有的最重要的资产就是你的可信度,并不在于你打算销售的产品,而在于你的品牌。 如果他们不认为你这人可信,那他们根本不会购买你的产品。无论你打算卖什么,你永远都希望招揽回头客。你只有一次机会留下良好的第一印象。你有两三次机会留下进一步的良好印象,但是良好的第一印象只有一次机会。大多数人出于某种原因——你要是不服气的话单就这个话题我们就能聊一天,但是这一点的确是事实——都会根据第一印象来评论你。如果他们第一次就不喜欢你,那你就没有第二次机会了。所以你的可信度必须无懈可击。如果对方接受了你的可信度,那么即便他们不同意你的话,即便你们身处篱笆两边,只要他相信你,你就可以说:“下个礼拜咱们继续讨论。”对方会说:“没问题,下次接着聊。”可信度意味着你的对手愿意继续与你见面。

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